The first time I ever laid eyes on him, I thought "what a geek" and he thought "what a bitch" Yeah well he was right. I was 16 and totally consumed with me and my own things, those things being my sons father. He was out there somewhere with someone and I completly ignored him. I was only driving them all around because I was the only one with a drivers license, I was the one with permission to take the car. So I took him and his cousin whom was dating my friend. They made out in the back seat, I drove around...we went back to the house, and pretty soon his mother was there to get him. I could tell he had something for another friend of mine and I so had my head up my ass....
The next time I talked to him like really talked to him, he walked up to me at the Alsups parking lot, and asked me if I could go in the store and buy he and his friend some snuff. Well by this time I was 18 still VERY self centered, living with my sons father, and had been a mommy for about a month. I should not have been out and about that night....but my mom was babysitting so I took advantage. Heather and I were screwing around town, while our "guys" were partying at some other peoples house. I had some to drink, but I wasn't drunk. I walked in the store, bought a few cans of Copenhagen, and walked out, said I will switch ya coats, and he said sure....so we switched, and I kissed him on the cheek and walked away. THAT KISS....THAT COAT....that was our beginning. I saw him more times after that....chewed him out once for shoe polishing my house, which come to find out he didn't do.
Now at this time, yes I was "with" someone else...BUT this someone else and I had no business being together. He had no intention of ever marrying me....had no intention of being with me...we were young WAY to young to be parents, but we had been together since 3rd grade so therefore we had to live together and we had to do the right thing. I think about it now and there is NO WAY in hell I am gonna do this to my daughter. BUT everyone expected it and God forbid he and I let everyone down. I wasn't in love with him, I did however have a child with him and I knew I had to be a good mom and a good whatever it was that I was to him. Did I love him...yeah I did and ya know in some way I still do, I love him for what he has given me...MY Zachary, but he has since gotten married and moved on. I don't hate him, I just KNOW deep deep down that he and I were not meant to be together.
I could go into the details with how we broke but that isnt' what this story is about....this is about our beginning. I moved out....I went to live with my mother and dad. One night, we were watching my cousins wedding video tape and I said maybe someday I can have that. The next night he asked me to marry him...and I said yes...OMG what did I get myself into?
By this time....I had realized his mother hated me...why I don't really know but I did realize that. I should have walked away then, and any sane normal person would have but NOT ME....I wasn't going to have this woman or or anyone else tell me who I could or could not be with. And I am not going to get into the whole first few months of it because it was torture...I was trying to learn how to be a mom and how to be me and how to be all of it....it was a VERY confusing time!
I am going to jump ahead to our first real place together, that is with NO ONE living with us besides Zachary...I was pregnant with Shelby and we moved into our apartment. Oh but it wasn't easy...we weren't married yet, I was still trying to figure out how to work this whole thing with my sons father and try not to let emotions get to high. There were times there at the beginning that I know BOTH of us wanted to give up, BUT it never did happen at the same time. Thank GOD.
On September 12, 1995 our beautiful daughter was born. Shelby Leigh, came into our world. He was 110% there for the entire thing, and believe me it wasn't a pretty birth! LOL It was scary!!! For all those involved. By this time, my sons father had said that he thought Shelby might be his...NO WAY...there is no way I got pregnant in November and gave birth in September, THAT is way to long. On top of all of that that ONE and only time that he and I had been together from the time our son was born till I left, I do not believe it was ever a finished deal, and condems are effective. BUT as it sat there should have been a DNA done just to put everyones minds at easy...BUT that didn't happen, he took one look at her and knew she was his...I knew she was his and I am the one that should know. His mother came to the hospital...wouldn't touch her...wouldn't have a damn thing to do with her...FINE with me....
We took her to his Granny...the one woman who could say yeah or nay....we pulled the blanket off of the carrier and she said OMG DJ she is yours. He smiled and said Good I signed the birth certificate. And the rest is history. AT least where that subject comes into play.
We moved back to Vega in October of that year. In November of that year he turned 18, we could finally get married. YES I was breaking the law...in some states, just not in the state we lived in. Yes his mother did try that!
Anyway...DJ ended up with $80,000 when he turned 18 from a settlement that he had gotten set up for him when his father died. We blew though that money like it was nothing. There was a lot we did and wanted to do and blah...we are both so VERY happy that it is GONE...GONE like a frieght train! That in and of itself is a nutty story and one that maybe someday I will go into.
On Febuary 16 1996 we were married. What a day that was...we were going to have this huge wedding..BUT that didnt' happen and wasn't gonna happen....there were to many people that were just way to freaked out about us being together for us to have had the wedding I wanted. So in January we went and got our marriage license. The third day we had it we were suppose to get married which would have been 1-16....well we got down to the JPs office and she was on the interstate pronouncing someone dead! So instead of getting married we went on our honeymoon. We already had the room and such paid for, so we went. Thanks Mom...she stayed with the kids! The day we finally went and got married, my mother, grandmother, and our children were there. A friend of ours, was suppose to film the wedding, but he filmed the top of the JP's head. And I can honestly say I cannot find the video.
Our wedding day was sorta nuts...he was on the road, he called the night before and I said something about the paper being no good tomorrow and it sucks that he missed Valentines day.....he said sorry he was in Mississippi....wouldnt be home for a few days...so we would have to do it again. FINE...well in typical DJ fashion, he showed up the next morning told me to get my clothes on...he had already called my grandmother and mother and they were suppose to meet us up there. I was soooooooo nervous....I was in the bathroom of the JPs office and took three shots of vodka...yes VODKA...didnt want anyone to smell it...By all means I should have passed out right then and there. BUT I made it though it and we did it! In a room full of bongs and pipes and everything else in between! Maybe someday I can get that wedding!
Our wedding night was a movie, Black Sheep and came home to being alone in our home, and we were so excited to be married finally we left the keys in the door...BIG MISTAKE...us on the living room floor and 10 friends walking in with a keg to toast our union! (pssssstttt...they still thought we had a lot of money) (we were BROKE) Yea well I can say the morning after we were both so HUNG over it was unreal!
And that was just the begining of our marriage...not a good way to start! LOL I will continue this story...I have skipped over a lot of uglies when it comes to me actually...and maybe I shouldn't have done that....I can say this....I messed up a lot at first....I was torn between my love for DJ and my childs father, not so much love for him but the fact that everyone was so mad at me..and NOW I would not have given a shit, but back then 17 or 18 I was just needing my friends! That and Michael and I had been together or at least friends since I was 7 years old. NOT having him in my life every day was something real hard for me to get used to. That and his family was all over me about getting pregnant so I could have his money...and to be honest until they brought it up..I didnt know there was any! He never told me. (small note...that money has been gone for 10 years I am still here) I had them get in my face and try to call me all kinds of things and run me off, his mother tried to pay girls to come to our house and break us up...LMAO...wanna know something funny, that same girl would come to the house and give us half the money and go in the back room and scew his best friend and leave! Yeah that worked! Idiot! She accused me of stealing, tried to beat the crap out of me twice....and Michael was always around and it was such a confusing time for me. NO it wasnt right what I put him through. ALL of that is so far in the past though. That was a total different lifetime. And the moment we were married we were married....and that was it! I didn't think about another man, much less Michael again. Well at least not for years............
Yes this is us about two months before we got married!!! OMG how goofy we look!
