Do you know what it is like to try to put up Christmas decorations with a howling kid in the back ground because he has pushed it so far that he got himself grounded....and I am not going to give in because that is what he wants and expects....I gotta make a stand and that is what I am trying to do but Christmas spirit and howling bawling children.....no matter how many times I say STOP IT...he doesn't stop...they just dont go together!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am sitting here tears running down my face so bad I wanna say OK you can come out if you promise to be good...but I know he won't be and I will be the push over once again.....so I am gonna stop decorating for tonight....and go about my night...baths, dinner and bed....that is all I can do! Maybe tomorrow I will have a better outlook on it all!!!! Maybe......
Oh and of course there is no support there....I call their dad to say hey ya know this is what I am going through....all I got was hey I gotta go I am loading up....call ya later!!! Sucks sometimes....just sucks....
My final word for the day....BAH HUM BUG!!!!!!!
Sunday, December 11, 2005
I have said it once...I will say it again...
THIS IS WRONG........
'Brokeback Mountain' wins best pic of 2005 from the L.A. Film Critics Assoc."Brokeback Mountain," the film adaptation of Annie Proulx's story of the enduring but thwarted love between two cowboys won the award for best picture of 2005 from the L.A. Film Critics Association.
I can't stress how wrong this is and how people are eating this shit up!!!! As I stated before I grew up with Cowboys and there are some damn fine cowboys rolling in their graves as we speak!!! THIS IS SICK AND WRONG!!!
Now if you make a movie about a drunken cowboy screwing a cow on occasion or even beating his wife and throwing his kid on a horse that no one was ment to ride...then yeah I would say Heck yeah that is a good fine way to show what a cowboy is like!!!
WATCH LONESOME DOVE...those are cowboys and there was NO love story in that between two men!!!!! There was a friendship story but damn it they LOVED WHORES!!! WOMAN WHORES!!!!!!
'Brokeback Mountain' wins best pic of 2005 from the L.A. Film Critics Assoc."Brokeback Mountain," the film adaptation of Annie Proulx's story of the enduring but thwarted love between two cowboys won the award for best picture of 2005 from the L.A. Film Critics Association.
I can't stress how wrong this is and how people are eating this shit up!!!! As I stated before I grew up with Cowboys and there are some damn fine cowboys rolling in their graves as we speak!!! THIS IS SICK AND WRONG!!!
Now if you make a movie about a drunken cowboy screwing a cow on occasion or even beating his wife and throwing his kid on a horse that no one was ment to ride...then yeah I would say Heck yeah that is a good fine way to show what a cowboy is like!!!
WATCH LONESOME DOVE...those are cowboys and there was NO love story in that between two men!!!!! There was a friendship story but damn it they LOVED WHORES!!! WOMAN WHORES!!!!!!
Made the Decission.....
Well this will be a Christmas to remember for my children!
I have decided, well we decided that this is NOT going to be about gifts this year! Not because we can't afford it...but because I know they have had a hard year, I understand that, but it has brought out the worst in them! I have no control over the situation anymore!
After the spitting, bitting, and all the other crap that occured yesterday and the threats of NO CHRISTMAS going in one ear and out the other, we have decided that there will be minimum gifts under the tree this year, and mostly things they need! They will get a couple of toyish gifts, that I have already gotten them! BUT they are not going to get the special stuff they usually get!
They will learn this year it is about being together and having a family! There are to many people in this world that dont have that! And they do...they have parents who love them to no end, they have each other...I would give almost anything to have one more Christmas with my parents and my sisters like it was back in the day! The pasta suppers on Christmas Eve and my clutzie sister spilling her entire plate of speghetti (SP) on the freshly shampooed carpet! And watching the sheer terror in her eyes as she looked up at Mom and Mom laughing herself into hystarics because she just KNEW it was gonna happen anyway! Maybe those three beers she had while cooking and preparing for everyone to be there had something to do with that? Hmm.....
Those are the things I remember, I could not tell you one dang thing I got that year....but I can tell you that that stain stayed on our carpet till we moved out! And my uncle brought his guitar and we all sang together! I can tell you the holidays that I had with my uncles whom I adored and the years they came home from college and what all we did...football in the front yard, golfing and whacking a ball into the church window! Things like that....I can't tell ya a dang thing I got though!
I can tell you my mom tried her best to make sure all gifts were equal in price and size and how she would fret looking under the tree counting gifts every day till Christmas to make sure it was all fair...and how she went all out every year to make it a great Christmas.
The only gift I can tell you I ever got was Trucks! When I was 3 or 4 that is all I wanted was a set of trucks! And when you are the only child of a very poor woman who worked her ass off to make the bills...and you got the ONLY thing you asked for, how she pulled it off I am not sure, I think my Grandfather had something to do with that, that is what is special! I want the kids to feel that! To look back and know exactly how it felt to wake up Christmas morning and smell the coffee and breakfast cooking, and how warm and toasty the house was and how great the hot chocolate tasted....not what I got when I was 11!
OK I have worked myself into tears thinking about all if it! It is about family and dang it we are a family! It broke my heart to hear Lane say yesterday, I hate this family, you all suck and I wished I had a different family! That hurt...we do so much for them, and they take it all for granted...well this year that isn't gonna happen!
This isn't gonna be easy...trust me it goes against EVERYTHING I know not to get them EVERYTHING they want! BUT it will be worth it...maybe not till 20 years from now, but it will be worth it! OK shannon keep telling yourself that and maybe you will believe it! HAHA
I have made loads of plans of things we are all going to do together, and have FUN...DAMN IT...we will have fun!!! LOL We are going to make Santa cookies, we are going to go to Bricktown and go sleding at the ball park, we are going to go look at all the lights, and sing Christmas carols, and we are going to make gifts for our siblings!!!!
Wish me luck!!!!!! Shannon
I have decided, well we decided that this is NOT going to be about gifts this year! Not because we can't afford it...but because I know they have had a hard year, I understand that, but it has brought out the worst in them! I have no control over the situation anymore!
After the spitting, bitting, and all the other crap that occured yesterday and the threats of NO CHRISTMAS going in one ear and out the other, we have decided that there will be minimum gifts under the tree this year, and mostly things they need! They will get a couple of toyish gifts, that I have already gotten them! BUT they are not going to get the special stuff they usually get!
They will learn this year it is about being together and having a family! There are to many people in this world that dont have that! And they do...they have parents who love them to no end, they have each other...I would give almost anything to have one more Christmas with my parents and my sisters like it was back in the day! The pasta suppers on Christmas Eve and my clutzie sister spilling her entire plate of speghetti (SP) on the freshly shampooed carpet! And watching the sheer terror in her eyes as she looked up at Mom and Mom laughing herself into hystarics because she just KNEW it was gonna happen anyway! Maybe those three beers she had while cooking and preparing for everyone to be there had something to do with that? Hmm.....
Those are the things I remember, I could not tell you one dang thing I got that year....but I can tell you that that stain stayed on our carpet till we moved out! And my uncle brought his guitar and we all sang together! I can tell you the holidays that I had with my uncles whom I adored and the years they came home from college and what all we did...football in the front yard, golfing and whacking a ball into the church window! Things like that....I can't tell ya a dang thing I got though!
I can tell you my mom tried her best to make sure all gifts were equal in price and size and how she would fret looking under the tree counting gifts every day till Christmas to make sure it was all fair...and how she went all out every year to make it a great Christmas.
The only gift I can tell you I ever got was Trucks! When I was 3 or 4 that is all I wanted was a set of trucks! And when you are the only child of a very poor woman who worked her ass off to make the bills...and you got the ONLY thing you asked for, how she pulled it off I am not sure, I think my Grandfather had something to do with that, that is what is special! I want the kids to feel that! To look back and know exactly how it felt to wake up Christmas morning and smell the coffee and breakfast cooking, and how warm and toasty the house was and how great the hot chocolate tasted....not what I got when I was 11!
OK I have worked myself into tears thinking about all if it! It is about family and dang it we are a family! It broke my heart to hear Lane say yesterday, I hate this family, you all suck and I wished I had a different family! That hurt...we do so much for them, and they take it all for granted...well this year that isn't gonna happen!
This isn't gonna be easy...trust me it goes against EVERYTHING I know not to get them EVERYTHING they want! BUT it will be worth it...maybe not till 20 years from now, but it will be worth it! OK shannon keep telling yourself that and maybe you will believe it! HAHA
I have made loads of plans of things we are all going to do together, and have FUN...DAMN IT...we will have fun!!! LOL We are going to make Santa cookies, we are going to go to Bricktown and go sleding at the ball park, we are going to go look at all the lights, and sing Christmas carols, and we are going to make gifts for our siblings!!!!
Wish me luck!!!!!! Shannon
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